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Marching On

March 1, 2016

 

Trauma. Once again, I'm talking about the six letter word with a big punch. Trauma is a part of the human experience, unfortunately, we will at sometime face trauma. Now before you back away and press the red x button, I don't mean rape necessarily. I mean we will face something that will conflict with our perception of safety or leave a permanent scar. Still don't get it? If you learned how to ride your bike there's a good chance you fell. For me, I scraped my knee, in a park, with older kids and they laughed. That traumatized me for a good two week. Then I moved on but I didn't ride a bike after that experience. See, that was a traumatic experience because I didn't believe I would fall especially since I had been practicing for the last month before the final "test." I for sure wasn't expecting for my knee to be scraped and for it to happen in a public forum but it did and thus it shaped my perception of riding a bike. I was like nah, this wasn't a good idea, just plant my feet on the ground and keep it pushing. For many people, they'd get back on the bike after a good alcohol rub and band aid. That wasn't me. Now I didn't fear bikes, I just didn't want to be on one. 

 

This is the same thing for people who've experienced more severe trauma. Once you've experienced trauma, it shapes the you, how you view the trauma, and the world around you in connection with the trauma. There's no rewind button to stop you from being traumatized nor is there a Zack Morris's "freeze" to stop the trauma or the perpetrator. Most people who have been victimized are left in a state of distraught because trauma usually doesn't come with big red letters on its forehead that reads, HEY I'M TRAUMA HERE TO TRAUMATIZE YOU. You find out about trauma after it happens, it violates your peace of mind. Too many people who've been traumatized bottle it inside because there's no place or group that specializes in healing trauma. Hear me out, if I break my arm I go to the hospital. The hospital is for people who are hurt physically. If my house is on fire I go to the firehouse station where firefighters are because, well, they fight fires and my house is engulfed in fire. If I need legal advice or representation I go to a lawyer. Depending on what legal issue it is, I'm going to need a lawyer that specializes in what I need to be done. But if I'm psychologically hurt where do I go without being judged?

 

There are mental hospitals (from experience, it's nothing like American Horror Story Season 2 but it's not Disney World either.) A mental hospital is a facility where people with authority pile up other people that they don't want to deal yet there's no effective measurement in helping those people who are psychologically traumatized get better. Think of prison but no jumpers and no cells but a doormatory in a long hallway where there are bars on windows. Staffs/guards do routine checks up on you every 15 minutes. You have no say so in anything and if accused of being "defiant," you'll find yourself being pressured to take a chemical restraint (happy drugs that knock you out) or a physical restraint (something like a straitjacket but no jacket yet staffs/guards climb on top of you until they think you've calmed down. But anywho, who would want to go to a place like that willingly when there are more cons than pros? Why seeks help when there are negative preconceived notions and you're viewed as incompetent and a defective thing? 

 

But when trauma is overlooked or ignored it can cause more problems like unsafe behavioral patterns or bad decision-making skills like drug addiction or negative social groups. So what does one do about trauma, psychological trauma? Talk about it. Simple! No? I know it's not as simple as just talking about it because if you're like me, you're super private and observant. You're watching and analyzing everyone around you like a paranoid schizophrenic. I can tell you just trust and let go, but I won't. Because trauma is so sensitive and impactful, I'm going to be honest with you and say, trust is earned not given. If you've been psychologically traumatized by anything, but let's say rape or molestation, seek professional help. Yes, a shrink. I'm not saying this because of guaranteed co-payments for some yuppie with an LCSW or MFT license and fresh out their PsyD program, I'm saying this because not everyone is equipped to help you the way a good shrink is. Yes, there are not so good shrinks, but you have the option of choosing. So seek healing and if you're adamant about that not the route for you but you know you're not healed, pick up MEMOIRS OF A FORGOTTEN CHILD. Not a shameless plug but kind of is. MEMOIRS OF A FORGOTTEN CHILD is my testimony about my own trauma and how it shaped me. The book accounts several experiences I had from 0 to 13. You get an insight about how I found myself helplessly sinking in trauma but throughout the series you'll see how I was able to find my way out. Hopefully, my story inspires you to tell your story so you can finally heal and unburden your soul that's been hijacked by trauma.

 

Be Entertained. Be Enlightened. Be Loved. ✌

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